I guess it would have never worked anyway, the fact that you are so busy has pushed me away from what I thought could have been something special. I loved you a long time ago but I also abused you. I hurt what we had and made you a monster. This doesn’t change the fact that when I look at you I still think of the days we were close. Now that we’re older no longer do we have that sweet embrace, but distance between us. Fingertips apart we have become.
No longer do you call, no longer do I get to hear your sweet voice. No longer do I get to speak to you about Harry Potter and Avatar, no longer do I have you. What has become of this relationship? What has become of our lives? Have we become so busy that our friendship is nothing more than words? I don’t know if I can take this anymore. I have become crazy, insane with the fact that we no longer have a emotional, physically, mental connection.
I blame myself for the yelling, the tears sliding down your cheeks. I blame myself for not wanting you when you wanted me, and I blame myself for me wanting you and you not wanting me. It was your decision to be strong and not deal with me, your decision to grow up and be a woman no longer a girl, a girl that loved me.
If just for a moment we could rekindle this old flame and let the candle light burn in our hearts, if just for a moment I could kiss and hold you again, rub you, caress you, love you, maybe, just maybe you will start to understand what’s been missing.
However what’s been missing all this time was love, the love that you wanted from me in College. Look at you now all dressed up in your professional attire, you no longer got time for a “boy” of my demeanor, I’m yesterdays news thrown in the nearest green trash can. Damn look at you a woman, a damn sexy woman, a woman that I could have had, a woman that is long gone…